So, have you guys ever heard of Chris Chandler? He happens to be a 25-year-old man who is still a virgin.
His hobbies include making my little pony dolls out of his own pubic hairs and also making models of women he wishes to have sex with holding babies. He wishes to name is baby "Crystal" whenever he actually gets the chance to ever have a baby. He wears a kindergarten-style clay medallion that has combined pikachu and sonic, AKA Sonichu, which he has copyrighted under a court of law.
And that's just the beginning.
When he went to PVCC (if you know what that is, cause i don't...i think it's a college in virginia.) He set up a sign on a light pole pointing to him which said, "I am a single man looking for a boyfriend-free woman." He goes on to explain points of interest for a woman. No girl stopped to give him "the time of day," so, he goes on to scream and rant and throw fits about how his autism prevents him from taking his fat, disgusting ass up to women and asking them for a date. (supposed autism, i might add.) So, the headmaster (dean, whatever you wanna call it) walks up and tears up his sign, claiming that he was soliciting for sex on a school campus. He was banned for a year from that college. To this day, he still goes to that college and waits outside, without a sign, for a woman to give him the time of day.
Now, onto the medallion.
In public, he wears the crappy-ass medallion that combines sonic and pikachu into sonichu, which was previously stated that he has now copyrighted in a court of law. Records show that he also has a "Dark Sonichu" medallion which he also wears. At one point, a woman, 19, at abercrombie and fitch had caught his eye. Every day, he paced in front of the store, looking up every now and then with a pained expression on his face.
The woman thought it was pathetic.
Finally, he must've gotten bored with just pacing there hours on end a day, so he brought his little protable video game system along with him and hooked his headphones into it and played pokemon. During this time, he altered between the dark and light medallions, which were of crappy kindergarten make.
Finally, one day, he went inside the store and guessed her age correctly. After that day, he never came back.
According to him, he has Noviophobia, which he has made up himself. The word "novio" is supposedly derived from the spanish word fo "boyfriend." Therefore, he is afraid of the boyfriends of girls.
In his community, he has been loitering within the society to try and find a woman, or a "sweetheart," to have his little Chrystal with. At one point, he was hanging outside a target, sexually molesting women with his eyes. This process went on for months (obviously, target being the dayshift for his eye molestation) and finally, a worker came out and willed him to leave. He claimed he was not loitering and he had a warrant to stand there, but when asked for it, he came up with nothing. Finally, the worker went and got security, which he nows calls "Jerkops" as in "Jerky Cops." He went into a long speech using excuses such as autism and pathetic attempts at looking cool, and halfway through the speech, he started to run. They hog-tied him and he was reported back to his family, who were very disappointed in him. Unfortunately, he did not go to jail.
Very pathetic, isn't it?